Sweet, loud, shameless, strange and caring, Mike is a swell guy. He just wants everybody to have a good time and stop being baby-back bitches. A bassist and dabbling guitarist, Mike’s life tends to revolve around music; he embraces a wide array of genres, from the softest, gentlest melodies to the hardest, most blasphemous blasting. He likes leather jackets, chicken parm sandwiches, graphic design and unlike Bryan, he prefers beards to mustaches.

One day he strives to own a lifetime supply of pistachios and retire on a party boat in a remote mountain village. He detests traffic and cannot comprehend it.